The New Land

Palora's Army

The Last Session

It was a cloudy morning when Taylox awoke in the Chapel of Sorin. He had spend a whole day finding himself in scripture. He felt like he had a better grasp on what justice meant. Taylox then went to the castle to meet the castle. He thought he’d meet his friends there.

On his way into the throne room he passed Salem. Salem was just about to send for Taylox, what a crazy happenstance. She escorted Taylox to the throne room. Taylox stood in front of all 5 council members and Salem. They council then began to perform a mental evaluation of Taylox. They showed him paintings of baboons and shivs and noted the response. It held alarming results. Taylox grew unnerved and the council thought It would be best if he found a place to calm down. Bowie walked Lance and Taylox to Eridos’ room so that he may lay down.

When entering the room that sudden odor of pipeweed attacked their smell. Taylox and Lance looked for the stash. Bowie locked the door, grabbed the nearest chair, and then smashed it on Taylox’s head. Trying to escape, Taylox attempted to jump through the window. He could not. Bowie swiftly delivered a solid throat chop and the dragonborn dropped. Lance squeezed through the window and went for help. He to get the other councilors. After explaining the mayhem the group rushed to Eridos’ room finding it completely empty.

Back at the sewers Simon, Lyra, Gene, and Claud were planning their escape. While doing so Bowie approached the cave with an unconscious Taylox. He was tossed in. Bowie then told Lyra that “the boys want to experiment.” and that she should make herself presentable in about an hour. He left with a skip in his step.

Simon smacked Taylox awake and informed him of everything. The cult, the plan, the whole ordeal. Their plan was that Claud would go get robes so that they could hide under them. CLaud found the robes and they were ready to go. However they still needed to get through the fence. After failed attempts at picking it, Simon sarcastically asked if Nick had the key. He did. They team left the cell stress free.

Lyra altered her appearance and was fit in well. Taylox attempted to hide his long face under a hood. And Simon the Halfling walked his tallest beside the humans. Claud found the secret door he saw the blonde lady and wizard come from. It was around the corner. However to get their, they had to pass a dozen men and the gnomish wizard. While getting to the door, the gnomish wizard noticed the drastic height difference between the men and Simon. He grew suspicious. Claud distracted the guard at the secret door. Gene followed the team from behind.

Just at the door, the wizard cast shatter at Taylox and Lyra. The boom echoed throughout the sewers and all the cult members stopped what they were doing. The urgency set in. Lyra was paralyzed by the wizard. Simon and Taylox had trouble getting out of a cistern. The 40 or so cultist ran after them led by the wizard. Gene shot her hand cross bow into the crowd to wound a few. She then turned to the party and said “Get out of here while you still can. I’ll hold them off.” Moments later the wizard formed a blade made of his blood and ran Gene through. Finally the group overcame their obstacles and made it though the secret door. Followed by the wizard and the cult of course.

From the door there was a tunnel going east. They ran for about a half a mile just barely outrunning the cult members. Finally the three reached a stair case that led to a trap door. The three opened the door and slammed it down. They took in their surroundings. They were in the Chapel of Sorin. Nobody was in the room except for Abbott Tibalt who was reading his hymn book. Tibalt was alarmed to see them and asked them to sit down. The party scattered.

Tibalt swiftly raised up a holy symbol and paralyzed Simon and Lyra. He approached the group. Taylox tried to freeze him but Tibalt was too wise. He then drew his hidden mace while saying “I told you all to sit down.” Tibalt swung his mace at Simon’s leg. Shattering it. The spell ended and they made for the door. Lyra was able to misty step past Tibalt. Taylox was hit while going by. Simon lingered behind due to his current injury. Taylox ran to the castle. Lyra turned back for Simon. She turned and saw Tibalt crushing Simon with a divine strike. Lyra then ran to the castle.

The two burst through the throne room doors to find the 4 council members and Salem. After vomiting the information to them, the council assembled their defenses. They summoned the current military general, the newly pregnant Fumiko and her Shrieking Samurai. Storm assembled his spies, but his star due The Marvin Squad (Brick Drippy Tip and Tiny) were out on a mission. Hakkin grabbed his wand and sword. Salem uncased her double bass. In need of a knight, Polynya wrapped her firsts. Lyra searched for Creighton. He ended saw no reason to help due to lack of reward. She went back to the castle.

Fumiko casually killed the gate guards, Ethan and Malin.

When the group was ready they went to the city to protect it. It was dusk and the sky seemed to bleed. Reds were illuminating the atmosphere. Screams (only the bad kind) were heard across the city. The smell of burning buildings was overwhelming. The cultist’s attack was quick and fierce. Polynya feared for Big Mama’s orphanage and ran there. The Shrieking Samurai spread to help the guards. Salem, Hakkin, Fumiko, Lyra, and Taylox went to Bosko Plaza, finding Abbott Tibalt, His wizard, and a small band of cultists.

The battle raged on. Hakkin and Lyra took on the wizard. In the heat of battle the wizard’s hood fell revealing that it was Marvin. His veins were glowing purple. Fumiko and Simon attacked Tibalt. Salem healed everyone. A few moments of fighting pasted when a roar was heard from a near by sewage pipe. Out erected a penis shaped flesh golem. It looked as though this was where the women’s skin were going. There was one small black patch. They assumed it was Simon. The monster joined the battle and fought vigorously.

Taylox shot an bolt through Tibalt’s throat. Hakkin tripped on his cape…. twice. Fumiko decapitated many cultists. Eventually it was the penis monster vs. the team. The battle was exhausting. As the party swarmed the penis, it began to thrash about. In the frenzy it fatally smashed Hakkin into the ground. Lyra observed and learned that it was weaker to magic. Combining magical forces the party fell the beast. At for a moment there was silence.

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